Okay, so if you haven't noticed, I am obsessed with food (if you haven't, then you're either an idiot or you've never read my blog before). Now, this obsession normally takes the form of eating anything and everything. After every crumb has been consumed, I then take a moment to decide whether I liked it or not and whether it was really worth eating. Digest and repeat. Simple way of life that has been treating me just fine for the last 19 (almost 20) years.
I am about to go against everything I believe in for the sake of science!..and because my fortune cookie from yesterday's Chinese take-out told me to try something new (and I would like to remind the makers that if anything they should be called "fortune crackers" or "fortune cardboard" because they are a shame to the category of "cookie" - and yes, I eat them anyway).
My obsession is taking a new turn. My BFF Erin and I are going to attempt to go on the Jillian Michaels's, the chick from the Biggest Loser, 7 day cleanse.
Before anyone panics at the word "cleanse" and jump to any conclusions, this is the baby of all cleanses, this is the diet coke of cleanses. It's got the same idea as the real thing, but it's just not quite as authentic.
The reason for our pussy cleanse rather then the real thing: Well, I am an eater, born and raised and I will never, not even for a week, give up this simple pleasure of life. We will be eating, just very healthy (i.e. lettuce).
The key to this cleanse, is the voodoo drink we have to consume daily. The recipe goes as follows:
60 ounces of distilled water
1 tablespoon of sugar free cranberry juice
1 dandelion root tea bag
2 tablespoons of lemon juice
Thank god we live in the hippie, health food capital of the country so "dandelion root tea bags" shouldn't be too hard to find. So the plan is, drink 60 ounce of this concoction (or the equivalent of 2 Nalgenes) every day, for 7 days. Apparently, you lose all your water weight, you lose your bloat, and potentially 5-7 pounds (which I'm sure you gain right back as soon as you stop drinking a kiddie pool worth of water daily).
I hope my diet of peanut butter and Diet Coke wont effect the results, because those are my dietary staples that ain't changin'.
Wish me luck! I'll keep you posted.
xo
k
2 comments:
LIE! YOU DIDN'T EAT CHINESE YESTERDAY!
There's an apothecary in Boulder where I know you can buy the Dandelion Root tea. It's on Pearl Street in between 8th and 9th on the left hand side :) And I know because I've done this cleanse before. It's awesome! Which reminds me, I should probably do it again...
But good luck!
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